so damn good · scarlett · COMPLETE

[anouk lirienne fournier]

She was already writing essays about painters and analyzing their work. It was hard and tedious and she had to think a lot, what was the point anyway when everyone had their own view of a paint? They could be interpreted in every way and no one will ever know the truth about them, just the painter who did it. Though she understood why it was important to study different styles and everything she couldn’t understand why she had to try and figure out another painter’s point of view of the world. Pictures where for feeling not for writing about them or that was what Anouk said. “Yes, I already know what is that all about. I hate paperwork you know… it’s much better the practice.” Anouk gave her friend a tired smile. Withdrawal was hell, and she had been through hell long enough already but this was for Alex and it was worth it. That was the only mantra who kept her from throwing all off the window and going back to her old life, that and the fact she loved Alex more than she loved her own life. It would hurt him deeply if she went back to her lifestyle and if she took things step by step she wouldn’t be able to do it at all. No, she couldn’t even slack for a minute, besides it wouldn’t make her any good.

Depression was bad enough as it was, and even now when she was so happy and had the man of her life she still suffered from it. The days she woke up alone in bed she felt the pain in her heart but all of that went away if she opened her eyes besides Alexei. She still went through sleepless nights, and more than once she had woken up in the middle of the night all sick. No doubt she looked paler and skinnier and tired all the time, and she had those big purple circles under her eyes. But well, being with Alex was making her happier than everything else. “Yes, everything, is not like one can go partying again with her mother on her back all worried because you tried to kill yourself.” She said rolling her eyes, not like she could blame her anyway but… she was glad her mom was giving her back her space. “As good as that sounds Scar… I am still not ready to go into the alcohol scene again; if I taste it I might not be able to do this.” She didn’t trust herself much; it had proved her wrong in the past. She had gone into real big problems because of her careless and her trust in herself that she could handle it all. She had broken in the worst way possible and now she had to go back building herself. She was happier, her muse was back, her energy was back too…

“Though… well I guess a bit of it won’t hurt.” She knew she could handle it maybe, but it felt like… betraying Alex somehow, or at least she felt that way. She had promised him she was going to give it up, though not completely. “I promised him so please if we are doing it don’t tell him.” Scarlett was every bit of bad influence as she herself was and it kind of made her laugh. She pressed all those matter back to where they belonged and laughed as her friend brushed her comment of. She knew she was going to drag all boys down with her but she just wanted to make one desire her and it was going to be the most difficult one. “I only want him to look at me.” That was so true, for once she didn’t want the attention of all the boys around her, she just wanted one.

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OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 642
NOTES, i am dating alex on here lol and chico on my mind so I have TWO lol

[scarlett neveah vayro]

Photography was not an easy subject, it wasn’t just about taking photographs of anything and everything, the photographs had to turn out good, they had to make the public feel something. Scarlett always made sure that her photographs had some sort of hidden meaning and depth behind it, she knew a lot of people wouldn’t understand the meaning behind some of her pictures, but she didn’t mind, as long as it was perfect to her she would then present it, if it wasn’t perfect she would keep on working until she found the right mind of frame in her pictures. Nodding her head, she looked at Anouk sympathetically. “I know what you mean, I hate having to type up all these essays; it’s obvious my views are going to be different from someone else’s.” Rolling her eyes, she just shrugged her shoulders. There was nothing she could do about it though, essays were in the curriculum, the Academy wanted the pupils to at least get some from of an education which they thought was good for all students, and that was essay writing. Essay writing was simple enough once you knew the structure, but sometimes her photography teachers liked to shake things up by not giving them structures or by giving them a random question about a random painter and/or photographer.

Scarlett returned the tired smile that Anouk, even though Scarlett wasn’t going through withdrawal she hadn’t had a drink in a couple of weeks because she was stupid busy with her romance project, it was difficult to understand what she wanted to come across in her pictures, but in the last week she had managed to produce a few amazing pictures which she thought were great. But she needed a couple of more pictures to produce the handbook, wasn’t friendship a form of love? Maybe she could add that in too, who said love had to be only between a man and a woman? Scarlett physically winced at what Anouk had said; she had tried hard to forget about Scarlett trying to kill herself because she felt partly responsible. She wasn’t in her best friend’s life enough to know what she was going through, who knew; maybe she could have prevented it? Nodding her head, she sighed. “I understand honey.” Smiling encouragingly at Anouk, she went back to looking at the dresses in her hands, they were gorgeous and she knew she was going to have a fun time. She didn’t mind that Anouk didn’t want to drink, Scarlett was being a bad influence by telling her that she should…but it was for the interest of her friend, she didn’t want her to go around with a head ache all the time.

Her eyes widened a little and her full smile returned back onto her face when Anouk spoke once more. Jumping up and down, the dresses jangling around her arms as she clapped her hands happily, she let out a happy sigh. “Don’t worry, I won’t say a thing. I promise, you need this girl anyway.” Smiling, she took another picture of Anouk; perhaps she could use one of the pictures they had taken together in her project? With her eyebrow raised she nodded her head, “You know you will darling, you know you will. Once he gets to Sydney and sees you in those dresses, he’ll only have eyes for you! Oh, by the way, I'm using one of our pictures in my project, not that I'm asking permission from you, I'm just letting you know.”

tagged// anouk!
outfit// click!
word count// 589!
thoughts// that's not fair! i should have one!

[anouk lirienne fournier]

School wasn’t one of her favorite topics; in fact Anouk almost never talked about it unless there was nothing else to talk about. And Scarlett and her could do so much better than that so she shrugged her shoulders. There was nothing they could do about that anyway and she wasn’t going to complain. But the next topic of choice wasn’t better really, since she was the kind of girl who wouldn’t talk about her private life at all and much less about those things. But Scarlett was her best friend and she had noticed what was going on with her and was worried enough as to ask her. Some people let it go, knowing she wasn’t going to answer or maybe because they really didn’t care. She saw the way her friend cringed at her words, but it was what it was and people should start getting over it. Anouk didn’t give it much thought in fact knowing there was nothing she could do now that the damage was done, she had gotten hurt and hurt those around her and regretting it wasn’t going to make time go back. She was conscious that not forgiving and torturing herself wasn’t going to help much but she wasn’t going to stop. Now she was between the sword and the wall. The sword being Scarlett and her suggestion and the wall being Alex and the promise she made to him. Though she hadn’t promise to give alcohol completely but it was highly recommended to not drink while you were getting out of a depression and a suicide attempt for the most obvious reasons. And to be honest she had been scared to death of this moment.

Anouk doubted her willpower, not the one of controlling the amount of alcohol but the one of not getting all depressed again and did something like the last time. She had nothing to fear now right? Because she had Alexei and she loved him and she was happy with him, extremely happy. What if drinking magnified her depression again? She shouldn’t be depressed but she knew the biggest part of it wasn’t because of Alex. The depression came because of the drugs and alcohol and it only got bigger with her broken heart which made her drink more and take more drugs and because she was more depressed because she double the dose then she felt she needed more to ease that. It had been running in circles only making it bigger and bigger each time. So yes, Anouk was still fighting her depression and she was scared she wouldn’t be able to manage it if she drank. “Thanks for understanding.” Though she doubted Scarlett will really understand what was going on inside her head, and not because the brunette was stupid but because she wouldn’t let her know. After trying on some more dresses and swimsuits she finally gave in to her idea though, she was strong enough and nothing bad would came out of it for just a little.

She laughed at Scarlett bouncing happily with the dresses in her arms. She didn’t need it really, but she was yearning for it. Her body had the need. Anouk nodded at her friend, happy that she was going to use one of their pictures in her project; she loved to include her friends in her paintings and sketches one way or another. Lately Alex and the rose he had given her the first night as a couple were starring in most of hers. “I have no problems with you using them.” Now that she was sure she could find nothing more in the shop she decided to pay and leave for another one. If she kept shopping at this rate one suitcase wouldn’t be enough and she didn’t want to carry too much baggage to this trip. “Let’s go for another shop huh? But I think I’m getting enough clothes.”

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OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 655
NOTES, then mmm you can have alex lol

[scarlett neveah vayro]

The top two topics in any conversation with a person was either something about family, home or your personal life, and the second one was something about school, boys, your professionals and social life; those were the two main topic starts because it was best to get boring topics out of the way. But for Anouk and Scarlett they always started with a random topic and then flowed from one to another. It was better that way because you got a mixture of things involved and you got all the weird topics out of the way too. The hardest topics mainly came either smack bang in the middle or somewhere at the end of the day before you drifted off to sleep, Scarlett was glad that she was awake and sober enough for this topic because someone going through withdrawal after something horrible was horrible too and she didn’t want her best friend to go through anything horrible at the moment because she was meant to be having fun! They were both meant to be having fun instead of staying stuck on this stupid matter, but for Scarlett if she didn’t put any input into her friend’s life or help her friend in anyway, then she really wasn’t acting like a best friend was she?

Scarlett thought that she did have a lot of willpower, though she really hadn’t been tested had she? Not as tested as Anouk and she hoped she never had to be because sometimes people put you through such difficult moments that it was difficult to decide what to do. Nodding her head at Anouk’s ‘thanks,’ she began to wonder what the girl really was going through, after all she wasn’t the one going through withdrawal and it was true that no on ever understood what you were going through, even if it was the same thing, different people had different ways of handling everything so they felt differently. People were far too different from one another, each human was unique and each acted differently. Even if two people were in love, sure they would feel that happy glow in themselves but there would be difference, just as how pain was perceived differently by everyone in the world. Scarlett wasn’t a girl that was used to showing her emotions, only the hurtful ones though, happiness and excitement easily shone through her and showed how she truly was, everyone knew this girl could be something, except for her; it was always difficult to put trust and belief in yourself as a person because you never thought anything great about yourself.

When your body yearned for something, it yearned for it a lot, Scarlett knew that a lot. Especially when it was food, it was as if your body wouldn’t stop giving up until it got what it wanted. Nodding her head happily, Scarlett sighed. “Good, and yeah we should go to another shop. I know…let’s find one more dress for you then. The mother of all dresses, the dress…or lingerie set that will make Alex want to rip it off you and just make love to you all night long. We need to find that dress!” Scarlett chuckled, walking towards the counter with her dresses and flashing a credit card out quickly.

tagged// anouk!
outfit// click!
word count// 545!
thoughts// lol, that's fine with me!

[anouk lirienne fournier]

Anouk loved her friends, she couldn’t complain at all about them. They worried about her and took care of her and made her have great times and memories. But sometimes she wished they wouldn’t care so much, she had too much problems in her life to solve and none of them were easy or pleasurable. She didn’t want to drag them around with her problems and so she kept them all for herself which just worried them also but less. There was nothing they could to help her anyway, she had to go through withdrawal alone and she will have to face her parents alone too, well with Alex but if she could avoid getting him involved she will. Life had tested Anouk in the worst possible way and had put a lot of suffering in her path, last time she had tried the easy escape everything had gone to hell and it only hurt the people around her even more. Now she wasn’t going to complain, she had to be strong for herself and for Alex because he was the only one who mattered. Her world didn’t revolve around Alex completely though, she had a safe place so in case everything went wrong she would able to cling to something and make it alive. She cringed a bit at the thought of losing Alex and she was sure it showed on her face. Luckily for her Scarlett dropped the subject there and she didn’t have to go deep into the waters.

She raised her eyebrows in surprise at her friend’s speech and laughed out loud. She doubted Alex would ever do that, Anouk had tested him a bit through the days, pushing a bit more every time and though he certainly had a hard time holding himself back he had done one hell of a job doing so. “If there is such a dress on earth I so want it.” She exclaimed, taking her dresses to the counter and paying them with her shiny black credit card. “Alex is made of steel I swear, I don’t know how he can hold back in such a way.” She had wondered that dozens of times, she had also thought sometimes that maybe she was the only one getting so turned on and excited. But there were times she could see the actual effort he was making too and how much it was taking to not have her in those heated moments alone in his bedroom or hers. “Let’s go to Agent Provocateur first and find that lingerie then we can go to Victoria’s Secret and then we can go find that impossible dress.” Anouk doubted they were going to find such a thing but it was worth a try and after all they had nothing better to do.

Opening the door of their next stop she found herself smiling evilly as the possibilities opened in front of her. Those were going to take a lot of effort, he wouldn’t be able to resist such a thing, as strong as he was Alex was a man after all and they all had a weak point. Anouk knew less meant more sometimes, but in bed and at night less was always definitely the best option so taking an Ellisa Corset she showed it to Scarlett. “What do you think? Sexy enough?” She walked around looking for another one, if she was staying there a week she needed something that will him drop his jaw during all the week not just one night. So if the first night he was going to resist the next would be difficult and so on until he finally gave in. Anouk felt a little guilty by doing this, but she wanted to give herself to Alex in every aspect. “Or maybe this?” She will also need something to put above it so next after all the sexy lingerie was bought she was going to find some kimonos and gowns that will also add that more is less touch all the guys loved.

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OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 674
NOTES, hahah deal xD I will have to hunt chico down though hahaha

[scarlett neveah vayro]

She was pretty sure Alex was only taking it slow because he cared a lot about Anouk, he wouldn’t do that on purpose just to tease a girl, somehow she wasn’t sure though, because even though she was good at reading people; the quiet ones were always quite difficult and it was annoying. “Ha-ha, don’t worry darling, we will definitely find you a dress like that because you so need it!” As the both of them paid for her dress, Scarlett rolled her eyes as if Anouk was over exaggerating everything, but she wasn’t, because it was true. Alex did seem to be made out of steel, at least that’s what Anouk’s whinging was showing her. “I don’t know either, if I was a guy I’d be on you so quickly.” She laughed, sticking her tongue out at Anouk; it was sometimes fun acting like a girl lover when she was with them because it was just fun. Having fun was always a number one priority, she didn’t know how Alex could even hold back on Anouk, wasn’t his manly urges ever tingling him? It was funny to think of it that way though, sure Scarlett felt bad for Anouk but it was amusing to see how much she wanted it. “Definitely, by the way you’re going to need lingerie for every night, not just the first or the last...we need to find the most provocative one for the night when you think you’ll be able to make him bend to your will.” Winking, she stepped inside the next shop after Anouk, looking around the area.

As a young kid, whenever Scarlett had to go lingerie shopping for her, she would blush because every employer would find it adorable that she found it embarrassing to be looking for things like bras, but now she was pretty much used to it. It was just weird when you were younger because you were growing and the employers knew...especially if you visited that shop all the time. Scarlett winked, “Very sexy, you need to get that one...!” Scarlett laughed, imagining Alex in the situation when he finally saw Anouk in something as open as that...he probably would pounce on her. Scarlett looked between the first and the second lingerie sets, trying to make a decision...but she failed. “Both are so good! Get both!” Her eyes scanned the rest of the sets and widened at another one. “And maybe this one!”

tagged// anouk!
outfit// click!
word count// 407!
thoughts// haha go find him!

[anouk lirienne fournier]

It was hard enough to go through withdrawal to add it the lack of sex life. It was as if she had just dropped everything in just one shot and it was getting to her. Yes, Anouk could live without all that but dropping everything without a gradual change was just plain hard and tiresome. Not to mention she wanted Alexei so bad that it hurt and not because it was sex but because she wanted to give him everything, she wanted to melt against him and become one with him, share everything she got. Before sex mean a physical act that could brought you pleasure or not depending of the partner, now with Alexei it meant so much more, it was giving herself completely and absolutely and getting tied to him in every sense of the word. It was going to be so completely different! Anouk laughed at Scarlett’s jokes and blew her a kiss winking. “Yeah because I just have that effect on girls, can’t help it.” She said laughing and entered the lingerie shop. She had certainly thought about what Scarlett had said, she will need sets for the whole week though it would be cruel for Alexei to fight temptation for the seven days and maybe he could get mad and want to sleep in another room. She feared it was going to be the latest and she didn’t want that to happen.

Anouk wanted to voice her fears to Scarlett but today she was showing so much weakens already, the damn headache was taking the best of her and transforming her into a whiny girl. She wasn’t that girl at all, she was strong and could handle situations, and if Alexei wanted to change rooms because he couldn’t fight his instincts… then she will find a way to get him around. “Yeah, I was thinking the same thing, we will see if he can fight temptation for so long.” She said winking and nodding as her friend said to keep both of them. Anouk looked around for gowns and kimonos and took the other set her friend was giving to her. “I’ll keep the three of them and I should look for something to wear off bed.” With that she took a Tilda gown and showed it to her friend. “You should also buy you know? I am not going to be the only one hitting on boys.” Though she was only going to hit on one Scarlett sure will know the meaning of what she was saying. She was so going to find someone for her friend so she could spend time with Alexei and well because she wanted her friend to be happy and who knew? Maybe she will even find love in Sydney! She also picked a matinee kimono that looked sweet. Anouk was going to drive him nuts with desire and test if he was as strong as he claimed to be, with all this he was sure to indulge in.

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OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 500
NOTES, I am so doing it hahaha