just can't get enough · alexei · COMPLETE

[alexei leon fournier]

IT'S NOT THE FIRST TIME I'VE HAD THE IMPULSE

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UNWRAP YOUR SKIN AND AXE OFF YOUR LIMBS!
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He nodded his head at her happily as she took her pill quickly, Alexei was used to pills. Because he was used to staying awake for so long and pulling muscles all the time when he worked out, he needed ways of keeping the pain to a minimum so had always had a spare pack of aspirin somewhere with him. At times he would work himself to near death just to get out of a shallow depressing shell; Alexei by no means was diagnosed with depression but at times he felt as if he should be because he was always depressed at the most awkward points. He was used to staying awake for long amounts of time and the caffeine helped with that, and sometimes he even needed pills for sleeping too. He was such an insomniac that doctors had prescribed him pills for it, he hadn’t told his father about it because he knew that the old man would unnecessarily worry about him and Alexei didn’t need that. Heck, he didn’t even tell Anouk or his step mom because no one in the family ever had to lie on pills. It was difficult for Alex to go to sleep at night, there were just so many things that went through his head at night, he felt so alone. He was prescribed once to go to a therapist so that they could officially diagnose him with depression, but even though Alexei wanted to know, he didn’t want to either.

He was slightly worried about Anouk, he didn’t want her to have to go through depression herself, being in a pit like that was not a good one because no matter how hard you tried to pull yourself up it was as if you were being suffocated by the sorrow. Depression was something that Alexei would never wish upon anyone else, it was just hard to pull yourself out of it at times. At least his depression didn’t seem to last for long, he was hoping that he was silently beating it himself but he had never been to the doctors or therapists so he had no idea what kind of chemical imbalance was taking place in his own mind. But he was going to make sure that nothing brought him down, he was going to make sure that he could thrive to be successful and live to enjoy his life as full as possible. He always played slightly on the safe side, safer than Anouk at least he could say, but he wanted to be more outgoing, to be able to talk to anyone without a fear of sudden rejection. It had been slightly working, whether it was because his own mind was fighting back against the depression or whether it was the influence of someone else, he didn’t really have a clue then. He nodded his head, “It’s fine, just make sure you’re ready!” he offered her a soft smile while pushing some of his hair out of his eyes.

His hair was always falling in his eyes, it was a hassle but he didn’t want to cut it because he thought his hair looked good. What was the point of ruining something when it looked good? He had thought about that of many artists work, some artists thought that just by splashing paint on a canvas it was amazing, but your art had to tell a story, it had to create emotions within a person otherwise what good was it? Whenever Alex wasn’t happy with his paintings he would start all over again, even if he had been working on a piece for a long time, he just needed things to be perfect, even though there was no such thing. He nodded his head, “You’re very much welcome.” He knew what it felt like to have your work shown out, when he opened his gallery it had consisted of mainly of his own work and he had been terrified to death about what people would think. The majority of people who had entered the gallery on opening night had liked everything but he knew there was a small minority who never even understood art in their life so why should he take their opinion on board? “I’ll always be proud of you no matter what.” He offered her another smile and moved a hand, ruffling her hair like a little kid. Chuckling, he shrugged his shoulders, not really feeling embarrassed about wanting to see Disney. “Hey, don’t laugh! Disney movies are the best!”

tagged// anouk!
word count// seven hundred and fifty five!
muse// breathe carolina - i have to go return some video tapes!
thoughts// whee!

[anouk lirienne fournier]

After swallowing the pill and pressing resting her head against her hands she wondered why her brother kept one box in his gallery. Maybe they were more similar than she had thought at first. But she could imagine so many reasons why he needed them than she decided not to ask. After all she was the one who was full in her way to have serious problems with pills, drugs and alcohol. Not that someone would believe it of her anyway. Before that strange state she was feeling into took all the best of her she tried different ways of avoiding it, and so far they were working. She felt free, she felt fine, she felt so not herself when she was partying that it was an addiction already. Something she couldn’t escape anymore. If she opened her heart to Alexei she was sure he would find a way to help her, but she wasn’t going to start worrying her brother now, not unless things got out of her control. Sometimes she would shut herself in the bathroom and cry for hours, thinking about her life and the way it was getting ruined for no apparent reason. Every day was getting more and more difficult to wake up and get up of her bed, it got more difficult to smile, and it got more difficult to cut the darkest colors out of palette.

As if to put more pressure on her, the exhibit crept over her and she would have to face all those people and listen to their whispers and critics with a smile on her face. With her quick temper she highly doubted she could bit her tongue, and with her downs she also doubted she was going to make it alive. Alexei had promised to be with her every step of the way and though they had their brotherly fights and sometimes he could get a bit annoying, he had never broken a promise with her. Since he stopped being cold towards her and opening to her charms he had always been a good support to Anouk and she had to admit he had become very important in her life. He worried and watched over her, sometimes silently and some other times not so, but either way she had always listened to him, even if she didn’t show it one little bit. She felt messed up and defeated, she didn’t want to fight anymore, she didn’t want to make it to another day if it was so painful and hard, and more importantly, she didn’t want to make it another day watching over him silently without the possibility of reaching out her hand to him.

There were walls she couldn’t cross. She tried to hide the sadness of her eyes as she laughed when he messed up her hair. “Hey! It took me hours to get my hair straight this morning!” She complained jokingly and got up to do the same to him. His hair was wonderfully long, enough to make him look attractive. “Thank you, you know that means a lot to me.” She almost doubled over with laughter as he said there was nothing wrong with watching Disney. That could be right, if you weren’t a grown up of twenty four years old who already had his own job. “Yeah, when you are five or six, or even ten, but you are twenty four!” She had thought about a good horror movie, she had taken a like to them lately because it they weren’t romantic, they weren’t dramatic and they didn’t make her think. They were what she needed for her mood, something entertaining. She had made even a game of trying to find one movie which will scare her for real, so far apart from some frights she hadn’t been able to find one. “But oh well, you had always been such a kid after all. Disney is going to be then.” She would agree to whatever he planned anyway, because she wanted to make him happy, and she wasn’t so interested in the movie, she just wanted to spend the night with him.

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 690

[alexei leon fournier]

IT'S NOT THE FIRST TIME I'VE HAD THE IMPULSE

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UNWRAP YOUR SKIN AND AXE OFF YOUR LIMBS!
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Whenever Alexei made a promise he went through with it, he had learned from his mother that breaking a promise was one of the worst things that a person could do in life, especially if it was a really important promise. Even the littlest promises were fulfilled by Alexei because he loved seeing that twinkling happiness in a person’s eyes, he didn’t want to see the distant hope fade away into nothing due to him. If he hurt someone on purpose, it would hurt him as much as it hurt them. Some people called Alex a sort of girl boy, mainly because he had emotions, though he hardly showed it to anyone. It was only when a person was close to him that they could see exactly how he felt and exactly what went through his mind. He was so used to hiding his feelings, pushing it down inside of him because he hated when people worried over him, he just wanted them to be happy. But for some reason Anouk was not happy, he could see that, he could sense it really, she just seemed so down lately but he didn’t want to ask her, he didn’t want to hurt her. But once again the inquisitive brother side took over him and his mouth opened before he could connect it to his brain. “Are you alright? What’s wrong with you? You seem down lately, did something happen?” He watched her with concern in his eyes, hoping that she was fine and nothing terrible had happened to her.

It could have just been the nerves settling in due to the exhibition next week but he didn’t think that she would have it that bad, it was just showing off her art work and she was a pro at that. In the academy she was in she had to show off her art work to a lot of people and that did take some serious guts and that was exactly what Anouk had; more than Alex at least. It was weird how much he cared for Anouk, he didn’t want to but they were close now, they had each other now and he would have to make her happy because they were brother and sister. His dad had sat him down and said exactly that just the day before he had met Anouk and Alexei still remembered it. Guys were really very clueless when it came to girls; they just had to really guess everything didn’t they? And that was what Alex was currently doing, he had to guess what Anouk was feeling because she didn’t seem all too well at that moment and if Alex didn’t do anything about it, then who would? He didn’t want her to fall ill because of him.

He rolled his eyes. “Damn, girls and their hair!” He let out a laugh and chuckled some more when she got up to mess up his own hair. Putting on a fake girl’s voice, he began patting his hair down. “Hey! It took me ages to straighten my hair this morning!” Pushing his hair back further he walked over to his seat and sat back down. “You’re very welcome dear.” He smiled at her gently, a warmth in his eyes that always appeared when he was talking to people that he loved a lot. And he could suppose that Anouk actually went into that category, it was slightly surprising but she was a good person. “Hey! Twenty four or not, Disney will always be classic!” He rolled his eyes at her, crossing his arms over his chest and pouting at her; Disney was actually a great thing to watch when you felt depressed, although it sort of heightened up your expectations of what you wanted your everyday life to be like. He smiled happily once Anouk agreed that it was going to be Disney for the night. He clapped his hands happily. “Yes! I love you!” Checking his watch he sighed. “OK, so we’ve got three more hours to kill in this gallery then we can pick up some Chinese and rent a movie on our way home...sound good?”

tagged// anouk!
word count// six hundred and ninety two!
muse// breathe carolina - i have to go return some video tapes!
thoughts// whee!

[anouk lirienne fournier]

Anouk couldn’t understand why he was so important for her now. They could have just been like those step brothers who were cordial toward each other and nothing more than that. But she had just wanted to make her mother’s wish come true, she wouldn’t ever forget how shiny her eyes were while she talked about her step-father and about how happy they would be and how much she wanted for Alexei and her to get on well. At first it looked impossible but she kept on trying, her mom really proud of her efforts. She was living her dream so Anouk was really happy for her, she didn’t want to shatter that happiness, regardless of what that affected her own life and how many things she had to shut up. Her mother and her had been really close, relying on each other for everything but now she felt like she was intruding if she stole some time from her, she seemed anxious if she was away from her step-father for too long. Little by little Anouk had started to speak less and less with her, and act more like an independent girl, sometimes too much. Her head snapped when Alexei asked her if she was alright, so he had noticed that something was out of place. “Nah, it’s okay, just a bit tired from all the working.” It wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the truth either.

Anouk wasn’t to go telling him what was going on with her, that she was probably deep into a depression and that she was going deep into drugs and alcohol and pills. It was just too much for her, it would destroy Alexei and her mother’s happiness. She wasn’t going to be so selfish, not if she could handle it alone. Her only fear was if she got out of control and did something really stupid. But for now she seemed to be doing fine and her mother believed she was happily busy with her art and her social life, she just didn’t know what kind of social life was that. She was hiding it mostly for Alexei to be honest, he already had too much to handle to get worried about her, and it would just hurt him if she suddenly got into that. It’s not like she regretted though, she had such a good time partying, and if she managed to stay under some sort of control nothing bad ever happened, so far no one had called her parents to pick her up from the police station or the hospital. She laughed when he mimicked a girl’s voice, making fun of her and her hair. She hadn’t spent all morning; she had just started to get ready for him.

“Well, that’s what make us especial you know?” She said raising an eyebrow. “And that’s how I got so many boys around.” She chuckled and gave him a half-smile, she wanted to stir the brother part on him, that overprotective side he got when guys were around her, because it made her think he was jealous, even if she knew that wasn’t the case. “Some of us do take proud on looking good and sexy.” She laughed happily when she saw him so happy. He could be such a kid! But that was a sweet side of him and it made her heart skip a bit sometimes. “I know you do. And just for the record, I only agreed because I kind of feel bad for lying to you.” She said, not wanting him to know she really had done it to see him all happy and excited. She would rather see some visceral movie with loads of blood than a pointless romance with a happy ending. But she didn’t have the guts to offer it when she saw his face. “Three hours?! Can’t you close earlier today?” The gallery was empty anyway, which made her wonder if it was really going okay for him. If he needed help, not only with the assistant thing but with everything he could just ask, and she would go running to his side in matter of seconds. But just like she did, Alexei also kept his problems to himself, probably for the same reason.

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 710

[alexei leon fournier]

IT'S NOT THE FIRST TIME I'VE HAD THE IMPULSE

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UNWRAP YOUR SKIN AND AXE OFF YOUR LIMBS!
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Family was always going to be important to him, losing his mother to a fire had made him realize that he didn’t want to lose anyone else. He didn’t want to lose his father and he didn’t want to lose Anouk and her mother either; they were important to his life as painting and arts were. It was slightly funny to be thinking that family was important because Alexei had been one of those normal teenagers who had detested his father during his teenage years, but teenagers were so different when they were in the stage of going through puberty and having secrets to themselves. Growing out of it though, Alex had realized that there was nothing important than family, art and love. He was glad that he was making his father and step mom happy now by being close with Anouk, every new parent was always worried whenever they brought their previous relationships’ children together in case of immense hatred and jealousy, but there was nothing really to be jealous about Anouk. If he had a stepbrother then that would have been a different story, but Anouk didn’t seem to try and outdo him in everything and he had gotten used to her and kindness. Tilting his head to the side a little he sighed and nodded his head. “Give up the work for one night ok? Your health is more important.” He knew he was acting quite over protective but what brother wouldn’t be?

Come to think of it, Alexei was actually pretty tired from working all the time too but he wouldn’t tell Anouk that otherwise she would accuse him of hypocrisy. The difference between them, probably, was the Alex had more stamina than her so could afford to stay awake longer than necessary. He thrived to stay awake for most of the time, being depressed slightly made him realize that he was very lonely. He didn’t want to force people into spending nights with him because then that would just make him annoying, he hoped that when he did receive an assistant she or he would spend time with him, it would be nice to see someone else’s perspective on his gallery instead of his own at times. Maybe he could convince them to even stay with him past midnight, after closing time just to have fun? Painting on his own was tedious, even though he liked silence; sometimes he wanted someone there to fill the void because he didn’t want to just hear the splashing of paint.

He smiled at Anouk; he liked having her around because she filled a part of the void in his life too. “That’s great, it’s great to be special.” He raised an eyebrow before winking at her. His lips settled into a thin line and his right eyebrow rose upwards, he didn’t like the idea of so many boys hanging around his sister; even though she didn’t pretty much conceal herself what with partying out all night, he still didn’t like the idea of many boys thinking of he as a prize trophy or a piece of meat. He knew what went through a lot of guys heads’ when they saw a hot girl, after all Alex was a boy himself. He sighed and shook his head, trying to stop himself from spitting something horrible out which would make her upset, he knew how mad she got whenever he tried to keep her inside instead of being with a lot of guys. “Well, I think you should stop dressing like that and think about getting serious with someone, exposing yourself isn’t good, you don’t know what goes through some people’s heads.” He nodded his head sternly at her, hoping that she’d understand the message that he was sending her but he doubted she would. “I do take pride in being sexy, a lot of girls like me.” He raised an eyebrow, a smirk on his face while he popped the collar of his shirt. “Ah well, you’re forgiven but yay for agreeing! I can close early I think…I doubt anything exciting will happen now.” Looking around the place he stood up, yawning a little and covering it up with the back of his hand before he spoke. “Give it another hour?”

tagged// anouk!
word count// seven hundred and twelve!
muse// breathe carolina - i have to go return some video tapes!
thoughts// whee!

[anouk lirienne fournier]

Anouk knew she would get sick at some point or another, and she knew it was going to be hard to hide from her family then. She had tried some sleeping pills she got her hands into from her source and they did the trick once or twice but no more than that. How could she explain to him that painting was the only thing that helped her sleep through at least four hours? And that her lack of sleep wasn’t because of work but because of him and the pressure around her? There was no way she could say that out loud, and there was no way she would allow Alexei to know what was going on with her, she didn’t even know it herself. Anouk knew she was important for him, she just wasn’t what she wanted to be and that was killing her, but she wasn’t going to allow that to hurt him if she could keep it to herself. “I’m going to spend the night with you, that means I have night off.” Spending the night with him was going to be good and bad, the good side was that she got to spend time with him all to herself; the bad side was that she got a Disney romance to watch with her unrequited love, all alone and without the possibility of even touching him. She wasn’t sure she would be able to handle it without some trips to the bathroom to calm herself but right now wasn’t the best moment to think about it.

Alexei was pretty tired too, she just knew it because she knew all the tiny bit expressions of his face, she had taken in all the details of him something he probably didn’t even realize. Sighing she decided to get up and stretch her legs while looking at the pictures hanging on the wall. How would she feel when the pictures there were her own? Will Alexei like them? Will he be able to get some money out of it? Will it help him somehow? “Part of the reason I’ve been awake was this exhibition, you know?” She turned her face sideways to smile at him, her arms crossed over her chest as she contemplated one of her brother’s pictures, he did keep a few of his own work at the gallery which Alexei loved because it gave the gallery the presence of him, his personal touch. “I’ve got them all sorted out, and this time I followed your advice a bit.” She had been told dozens of times to get out of her comfort zone when painting, and one night she had woken up in the middle of a dream that inspired her to do so. She hoped he liked it because it had been done for him thought she doubted he will realize, and part of her hoped he didn’t. “I think we should do an exhibit together sometime.” She would love to see both their work hanging on those walls.

Anouk laughed openly at his expression, her comment giving her the reaction she had been waiting for. She knew he didn’t like one little bit when she went out partying and hunting boys, Alexei had always been reserved and barely attended to social events, but Anouk loved to show herself to the world and bit it. She knew what boys would think of her, but she thought of them the same way, and she liked what she did, not caring one little bit the title they could place above her head. “I know exactly what they think when they see me.” She said to him. “That’s why I do it.” She made jaws drop and necks turn as she passed by and she loved all that attention. Boys could think she was easy but she made it hard for them to get her to bed at the end of the night; she loved to play the flirt and hard to get. Except if the boy was worth enough and she didn’t want to let go. Alexei did cared for her reputation, but the world of the night was just made for her and she was the queen, the hot girl, the one everyone in the club wanted but only a lucky few could really get. She wasn’t going to get serious, she couldn’t get serious without him anyway, so what was the point in trying? “An hour’s fine, I like it here anyway.” Because she felt she was in his house, in a very special place for him. “And if we are going to see Disney, please find the less cheesy one.” She requested, hoping that at least he would gave her that.

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 787

[alexei leon fournier]

IT'S NOT THE FIRST TIME I'VE HAD THE IMPULSE

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UNWRAP YOUR SKIN AND AXE OFF YOUR LIMBS!
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Being sick was only good when you had your own mother, she’d bring you up some soup make sure that you were lying in bed all snuggled up and kissed your forehead. It was just perfect having a mother really, but after his step mom came into the picture, Alex didn’t want to be sick. He didn’t hate his step mom, it didn’t go that way, in fact Carine was actually a great mom and he could see that from the way Anouk turned out, it was just that she wasn’t his mom. She didn’t really have that proper bond that birth mothers and their child had, even though she tried her hardest. Alex wasn’t just yet ready to give that spot to her. He loved Carine, really he did and anyone else could see it, he just didn’t want to hold her up the point where his own mother was and he didn’t want to get too close to her. What if she disappeared one day too? Losing a mom was hard, but losing a second mom would have been more difficult and he didn’t think that he could go through that once again. He smiled at Anouk, glad that she was there at this moment for him. “Well I guess that’s a good thing, one day off isn’t going to hurt you, especially if you’re spending it with me.” He was glad that they were going to spend some time together, he definitely did miss her. Anouk was just a little bundle of energy all the time and she made everything much more bearable.

He knew that she was going to do everything perfectly, even if sometimes to other people, she seemed unreliable, for him, Anouk was the most trustworthy person and you could always count on her. She wouldn’t let him down, she wouldn’t break any promises and she wouldn’t let him down with the exhibition. Her artwork was incredible and he knew, he just knew that she was going to make him a lot of money. Not that he was going to keep it all for himself, the money that was going to be raised would mostly go to Anouk, after all, her hard work had to be appreciated. He smiled apologetically at her, his eyebrows pushing against one another as he felt horrible about it. “Ergh, I’m sorry Anouk, I didn’t want you to work so hard, you could have told me and I would have pushed the exhibition date back!” He shook his head, running a hand through his hair and tugging at the ends as a wave of guilt ran through his body. He smiled finally and nodded his head. “Wow, first time you followed my advice I think...but good.” He smiled teasingly at her, moving his hands to the side a little, rubbing his hands over opposite arms. He raised an eyebrow as she suggested doing an exhibit with both their works’ on display, he didn’t mind the idea, and he really didn’t. In fact it was a good idea, one of the best, moving everything and doing everything for the gallery had taken quite a huge toll on his creative mind but he was trying to get it back lately. “I think we should to, I’ll setup another date soon and we can do two different themes.”

He shook his head in disbelief at her reply to what he said about a boy’s perspective of her, he didn’t realise how...exposed his sister was to the world, it was as if she never thought about the consequences, whereas in comparison Alexei always thought about the consequences. It was difficult not to, people already thought lowly of many artists anyway. He shook his head, “No comment at this moment, I don’t think I can sum one up that’ll sound nice.” He sighed, running a hand through his hair again and standing up once more, he didn’t like to sit down much at times. At times he loved to fidget quite a bit and it was an annoying habit for him but he just couldn’t control himself in that way. Nodding his head and relaxing his tense jaw, he breathed out. He couldn’t be angry at Anouk, she was his sister and she wasn’t really harming herself in anyway was she? She was just doing what she loved to do best and Alexei had to appreciate that and let her do what she wanted. It was all he could do without bearing over her like a dad. “I’ll think about it, cheesy is always good in a Disney film.”

tagged// anouk!
word count// seven hundred and sixty five!
muse// breathe carolina - i have to go return some video tapes!
thoughts// whee!

[anouk lirienne fournier]

She could see the increasing worry in Alexei’s face. She shouldn’t have let him know about her headaches and her sleepless nights; it just had sort of slipped. She had been bearing with it for a while now and there was no need of filling him in this. She smiled to him, noticing he was looking forward to this night together as much as she did, he seemed to have missed her too, and she was happy she wasn’t the only one. “You are right, if it’s with you it’s always better, but like I said, you better get your ego checked.” She said laughing. She didn’t understand why Alexei had decided to be an antisocial guy, refusing to open to the world around him. He could do so much better, because he was so sweet and caring and funny to be around. Anouk on other side was a complete social buttlerfly, always going from social event to social event, from boy to boy, and making friends whenever she went. The only problem lately was that she was doing the wrong friendship. Alexei wouldn’t be happy to know the kind of people she was seeing lately, but of course, who would like to know his little sister partied with drug dealers and troublesome people?


She didn’t mean to make him feel guilty when she had mention most of her sleepless nights were because of the work but it was better than telling him the truth. She had to bit her tongue hard in order not to spill everything. “Hey, that’s the artist life, isn’t bro? Besides, I didn’t even know when It was remember?” She said smiling to him kindly and trying to stop the impulse of hugging him or taking his hand. She was planning on giving Alexei all the money she made with the exhibit; she didn’t need it at all because she had more than enough. She wasn’t going to find an apartment or something like that just at the moment so why keeping it when she could help him? She was sure he will somehow refuse her offer but it was worth giving the try. “I was thinking you can keep whatever I make from this one, I had more than enough and you can give it better use.” She said, hoping he wouldn’t take it as an insult but just as a way of giving him her thanks for everything he was doing for her, and a way of her trying to help him in everything she could. She jumped all excited when he accepted doing an exhibition together; she ran to him and circled her arms around her neck. Anouk was the touchy kind, she loved to give hugs and kissed to the people who mattered to her, it was the way she had of expressing her love. Some people find it uncomfortable and she hoped Alexei wasn’t one of them.


She had always been this way; she just recently had stopped showing her love to him because it had been too hard for her. Realizing what she was doing she jumped back, and smoothed her clothes just as a way to keep her eyes low. “Sorry, I got too carried off and excited for the exhibition.” She apologized and went back to the chair. There was another proof of Alexei worrying too much about her when he shook his head in disbelief. She laughed at his sentence knowing that would make him mad, she loved to tease him as much as he loved to tease her. “It’s not like I don’t know how to take care of myself. I just don’t care what people think about what I do.” She shrugged and smiled. She wasn’t going to try making him understand the way she lived, for someone who would rather be sitting at home all alone than going to a party would be difficult to understand. She knew he was scared of her getting hurt, what he didn’t know is that she was the one doing the hurting. Anouk frowned when he said cheesy was better. “I’m not really into the mood of cheesy you know.” If she had to go through a session of cheesy with him she wouldn’t be able to handle it all. Not when her own prince charming was sitting next to her and as far away from her reach as the moon.

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 734

[alexei leon fournier]

IT'S NOT THE FIRST TIME I'VE HAD THE IMPULSE

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UNWRAP YOUR SKIN AND AXE OFF YOUR LIMBS!
--------------------------------[/center]

Confidence was always a key thing in life; it was the element which all beings needed to get by. You hardly saw any introvert people getting any praise or ever saw anyone notice them at all. If you didn’t have confidence, if you didn’t speak to people you never really did much in life it seemed. You were always going to be in the background, just doing what you do and people noticing once or twice but never really ever paying much attention to your job. He supposed that many people didn’t even bother to care about what Alex did most of the time, his art was just art, nothing spectacular, nothing amazing and he stayed quiet all the time; never speaking out of tone and voice and just letting people trample over him with speech. He was the sort of person without any ego, he could of course act like someone with one but only to those who were really close to him; he never wanted to give out the wrong impression of himself. What was the point? If you gave out the wrong impression of yourself then people tended to begin to hate you and Alexei didn’t like that one bit. He was a nice guy and he knew it. “Darling, like I said before, I don’t have an ego, you just very much assume that I do. But there’s nothing that bad with having an ego is there? I like to pump myself up, especially when you’re around and not just only because I’m your older brother.” He smirked at her, shaking his head for a second with a quiet laugh.

He rolled his eyes with a small smile on his face. “Well I guess it is the artist life, but still, I don’t want you passing out on me now do I? How many times do I have to say that to get it through your head?” He shook his head at her, she was always so stubborn, exactly like him and so they hardly ever got anywhere. In an argument both would stay stubborn and annoyed at one another unless Alexei finally felt guilty or unless Anouk finally felt guilty and decided to apologise. Their relationship was just like a normal brother and sister relationship even if they weren’t blood related and Anouk had come into his life twenty one years too late, it was amusing how easily they got along and how much they bickered as well. You’d assume that the both of them knew each other for the whole of their lives even though they hadn’t. In fact Alex felt as if he had known Anouk for his entire life, he knew so much about her and she was always there for him, he trusted her a lot compared to other people. He rolled his eyes at her suggestion. “Yeah right, your art work, your money. You get to keep it, end of discussion. Anyway I’m getting a few cheques here and there just to keep this gallery open because some rich people like the idea of art being exposed downtown.” He raised both his eyebrows, wiggling them a little. He wasn’t lying about receiving cheques, they just weren’t all too much really, and some rich people were actually quite stingy. He didn’t want to take Anouk’s money from her at all, in fact he was a little bit irked at the idea that she thought he’d want to take the money, but his expression showed nothing really.

His eyes widened a little in amusement as she jumped up in excitement at the idea of the both of them doing an exhibition together, he didn’t actually mind the idea of that; it seemed pretty fantastic in fact and it would make a great headline story. A brother and sister making art together, it sounded funny and interesting at the same time. Eyes widening a little at the sudden hug from Anouk, he held his arms out, it wasn’t fully encircled around her waist, in fact it was a few inches away because Anouk hardly ever hugged him these days, he just thought it was because she was becoming more aware of her body or something like that and as a girl she felt embarrassed to hug her brother. It seemed to be the most common explanation really. He patted her back softly, his other arm around her waist before she pulled back quickly. Raising an eyebrow he shrugged his shoulders. “It's fine, an idea of the both of us doing an exhibition is actually pretty exciting.” Letting out a small laugh, his lips went back into a thin line at their topic of guys and Anouk. “Well fine, but I think that you should.” He nodded his head at her sternly before turning around and fixing up the papers on his desk. “Alright, alright. No cheesy movie then, what do you want to watch? You can go pick up any movie you want.”

tagged// anouk!
word count// eight hundred and thirty!
muse// breathe carolina - i have to go return some video tapes!
thoughts// whee!

[anouk lirienne fournier]

Everyone who didn’t know them would think they were real siblings and that hurt Anouk no end. She only wished her mother had decided to marry another guy so she could throw her arms at Alexei without fear, but of course that didn’t happen and she wouldn’t have meet him if it wasn’t for that. She didn’t want to feel that way and she had fought against her own feelings every day but it she lost the fight when she went to bed. If she randomly slept with guys and did all she did was because she could not stand the pain in her chest. He was the most anti-social person she had ever met apart from Drake which was a whole different story. She knew he had no confidence in himself or desire for spotlight, he stepped aside and allowed the rest to take it from him and that annoyed Anouk no end because he could be so much more if he just tried. But what she could do? She had tried to tell him and he hadn’t listened, they both were quiet stubborn but Anouk gave in at him in almost everything. She would say yes to jump off a bridge if he ever asked. He kept everything to himself and gave off that cool vibe of big brother around her. She raised an eyebrow and chuckled at his comment. “You do have an ego, you just show it to me which is too bad for you because it would get you far.” Her eyebrow shot in surprised and she gave him a half smile. “Trying to impress me much then?” She said joking but trying to understand the meaning of that last sentence.

He always worried too much, which was exactly what she had been trying to avoid by hiding the whole matter to him. If he got so stubborn about simple sleepless night how worried he could get if he knew the truth? Shivers run through her body and she hoped he didn’t notice. Instead she raised her hands in surrender, hoping that would make him drop the subject so nothing more would slip from her mouth. “You win. Happy now? I’ll get a good sleep tonight with you.” And she was sure as hell that he was going to make sure of that. When she had been close enough to him back in time she had fallen asleep on his lap while watching TV or a movie countless of times, now she planned on sitting at the farthest end of the couch and curl up there, probably circling her legs with her arms to prevent them from moving towards him on their own. She stared at him hard when Alexei said she had to keep the money, but she had already decided she was going to donate it to the gallery. It wasn’t him she was giving the money, or at least she wanted it to look that way. “You didn’t understood, I am donating my money to the gallery, and there is no point on discussing this because I’ve already decided.” She crossed her arms making her point and she knew this was going to be one of those things she wouldn’t give in to him.

Exposing her work to the world with her brother made her happy no end, thought she had actually no idea how she would manage to get the paints done with so much going on in her life she wouldn’t let him down on that. She didn’t know how the idea hadn’t crossed her mind before, but then again she had been too busy avoiding thinking of him and failing miserably at it. She saw the expression on Alexei’s face as her sudden emotional display to him, it had been longer than she had thought since she had expressed her feelings toward him in such a way. But today her walls were down and full of cracks and she could barely hold them together anymore, at some point or another they would break and then hell would take total control of her life. She hid her embarrassment by raising her eyebrow and smiling at him. “What? Can’t I hug my big brother now?” She hoped he didn’t knew her that well to know her real feelings, but he had never showed sign of noticing them so right now she shouldn’t worry about it. “I know I’ve been kind of cold but that’s because I grew up, but a hug from time to time can’t hurt.” So far this had been the second, and she had to admit she had loved the way his arm had been on her waist, it had felt perfect. She clapped when he gave in her little wish. “It’s going to be… You know what? I’m in the mood of watching The Little Mermaid.” Screw the cheesiness, she was in the mood to suffer a bit more, knowing the mermaid was deep on forbidden love. Anouk could also hope for her happy ending right?

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 834

[alexei leon fournier]

IT'S NOT THE FIRST TIME I'VE HAD THE IMPULSE

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UNWRAP YOUR SKIN AND AXE OFF YOUR LIMBS!
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Alexei had been told enough times that if he just believed in himself, if he had a little faith and knew what he could achieve in the world then he could be someone better. Anouk had told him that enough times but Alexei had no idea as to why he didn’t believe her. In fact, he was already far too comfortable with the way his life was going now, even if there were some problems here and there, there was still some sort of familiarity with all his routines and he didn’t want that to change or didn’t want to change himself creating a larger impact on his every day life. What was the point anyway? His life was so far going (sort of) perfectly and he wanted t live like that. Changing himself now would just be a hassle, after all he was twenty four years old, he was old enough to not be taken notice of anymore so what was the point? That question rang through his head many times, especially when Anouk pestered him about being more confident with his style and work, he just thought that. There really was no reason into doing something like that now was there? He rolled his eyes at her when she told him that he could go far if he had a sort of ego. “Stop trying to change me woman!” Letting out a small laugh he leaned back, sitting against his desk, letting his left leg swing back and forth as his hands joined together to place themselves on his lap. “You know I’m always trying to impress you, you may be my sister but you’re a girl too. If my charm works on you then it’s a guaranteed success for all other ladies.”

Crossing his arms over his chest, he let out a laugh, nodding his head appreciatively. He was in fact really glad that she was listening to him, apart from her he didn’t really know of anyone who would listen to him and do what he wanted. He was glad to have Anouk as a sister, even if there were some problems with the both of them. “Yes, I am very happy indeed, nice of you to make me so happy sis.” Letting out another laugh, he looked around the gallery. There really wasn’t much to do, he kept the entire place clean, he made sure that all art pieces were delivered and hung up on time, he made sure everything was done properly. No wonder it got so boring during the evening, if he let some things slip from his mind and did them in the evening when the gallery was practically empty then he wouldn’t have to just stroll around the gallery and do nothing. He shook his head at her first. “But giving the money to the gallery is like giving the money to me, you know I won’t accept it. Thanks Anouk, but really it’s yours. Buy some dress with it for further exhibitions or something.” He smiled at her, leaning forward and gently ruffling her hair once more. He wasn’t going to agree to her giving the gallery the money, even if she was going to be stubborn about it.

It was funny being hugged by Anouk, sure she had shown a lot of emotion at him when they had first met but that was only because she wanted him to like her and not hate her like he had done from the beginning. She just wanted him to give her a chance and he had given her that. Ever since he had begun to like her as a sibling she had withdrawn from him, which was slightly annoying because she had worked a lot just to get him to like her and then completely vanished from it. “Yeah of course you can, just surprised is all.” He shook his head once more, a smile on his face this time though because he felt happy suddenly, it was as if their previous, proper, loving sibling relationship was coming back. Even though Alexei would never admit it, he had sort of missed Anouk. “You’re right, a hug from time to time can’t hurt, I’m happy you’re still into hugs with your brother, thought I’d probably be cramping your style if I did that.” He chuckled, running a hand through his hair and stood up from his desk. His eyes widened in surprise when she told him she’d watch ‘The Little Mermaid’ him. He jumped up, “Yay, the Little Mermaid it is! Thanks sis!” Walking towards the door he turned the sign around and then looked back at her. “For that, I think we can leave earlier than intended to.”

tagged// anouk!
word count// seven hundred and eighty seven!
muse// breathe carolina - i have to go return some video tapes!
thoughts// whee!

[anouk lirienne fournier]

It was annoying that he would listen to Audrey about changing and not her. And that made her be a tad mad at the girl who wasn’t the one to blame really. She sighed; there was really nothing she could do so she would have to just give up. She hated losing toward someone and even more if it involved Alexei, but he was stubborn and it seemed as if her advice wasn’t good enough for him that was at least the way she felt. He had decided to go for the easy way and that was a waste of talent. At the academy they pushed them to the edge, forced them to think about a future, and pressed them until they broke to make sure they will be able to handle it later in the future. There was no doubt her path wasn’t the easy one, unlike Alexei she wanted to shiny bright with her art, give everything she got inside and show it to the world, she dreamt with her paintings hanging off the walls of rich mansions around the world, everyone with her name in their mouths. She wanted to make her talent known, while he wanted to remind as he was now. He could still push a bit father, and Anouk was going to make sure of that when they made the exhibition together. She was going, for once, let him shine and get the spot her deserved. She laughed at his outburst but it faded to give surprise in her way to surprise in her face, her mouth wide open. Then she scowled at him. “I would like if you stop using me like a rabbit for your impress experiments.” She said frowning.

She didn’t like thinking of her brother using the same tricks on girls, and she wasn’t going to tell him all of them worked on her. Maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to boast his ego, he would end up becoming a playboy and girls would clung by her side, the only idea of it sent shivers down her spine. She did enough giving in everything, always spoiling him like a child when it should be the other way around, but seeing his happy face was priceless to her and nothing he could give her was better than that, unless he decided to go out with her which wasn’t going to happen, only in her dreams. Just like right now when she had surrender once more to him, his happy face made it worth loss her own pride. Anouk wondered if he never gave it a second thought, the way she treated him as if he was the most important treasure. But well, he never gave her much insight of what was going on through his head so she couldn’t be sure about it. “You always win after all.” She looked at him while his gaze wondered around the gallery, the place was pretty much dead, it needed people around, it needed some life, but in some sense it was like him, quiet and calm and hiding under a wall what it truly shined inside. That’s why she loved that place, it was filled with his essence, his soul. She frowned at him, knowing he wanted her to give in just like she always did, but this time it was a win for me. “I don’t care Alex, I am going to give it to the gallery, get over it, you are a grown up.” She wanted to show him she was also a grown up too, not that seventeen kid he once knew.

She knew she had surprised him, she had surprised herself. It made her realized how much he hurt over the distance she had put between them during that time, and that hurt her too deeper than a knife. Maybe it was better dealing with the pain while she was with him than dealing with alone and hurting him with it too. Everything was fine as long as it was happy, that’s why she had been shutting down her feelings right? Doing all the effort without realizing or caring about how he would feel with that, she had just assumed he won’t give it second thought. “I guess you will have to grow used to it once again.” She said laughing happily, because around him she could be her bubbly happy self again, even if her pain got deeper and unbearable his smile was enough to keep her above the water and sometimes to give her a break from it all. “Just not too much. I’m nineteen now, like you said it won’t look good on my record.” She tossed her hair back in place to look important and laughed. And doubled over when he jumped like a little kid, his facing all lit up, when she announced they would see ‘The Little Mermaid’ He could be such a little kid. “Okay, let’s go home then, before you turn into a five years old and I have to take care of you.” She said kissing his check and winking at him, her heart pounding in her ears and feeling as happy as she had felt in a while.

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 870

[alexei leon fournier]

IT'S NOT THE FIRST TIME I'VE HAD THE IMPULSE

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UNWRAP YOUR SKIN AND AXE OFF YOUR LIMBS!
--------------------------------[/center]

He had no idea why but Audrey did somehow manage to change his characteristics a little, something which many people could never really do. When it all came down to it, it was probably because Audrey didn’t really care if he changed or not, she was doing things for the better and she was being nice about it. He was stubborn, yes a lot of people were, but Audrey spoke to you in a way that you felt horrible if you said ‘no’ to her; that’s just how nice she was. She was soft, sweet and literally to him, she was pretty much one of the flawless girls in Paris even if she did have a rich background she was quite an amazing girl. He didn’t think he was feeling anything for her; she was just someone very close to him. She was also close to Anouk and Anouk liked her so it made everything all the more better. Anouk was the star in the family, Alexei could sense it from a mile away, even though he was doing successfully on his own with his own gallery and selling his own paintings he could tell that Anouk was going to go farther than him. Her paintings would be in world famous galleries, she’d be appointed by prime ministers and presidents unlike him, but he was all right with his life style, he didn’t need to be the shining star that everyone wanted him to be. “Sorry, sorry, but come on, if I can’t experiment on you, whom can I experiment on?”

Even without an inflated ego, Alexei did have a fair few girlfriends, there were a lot of girls who liked him and there were a lot of girls who wanted him, he just didn’t really want them. And no, he wasn’t playing with them, he just wanted to find someone that he could be there for, he was one of those guys who did like commitment…at times. He wanted to treat someone with love and nicely, he didn’t want to just hang about with someone for the fun of it. But he was actually doing that right now, sometimes being a guy had its disadvantages because Alexei did want someone sexually a lot of the time, what guy wouldn’t? At least he didn’t spend a lot of time inside of different girls and stuck to someone he liked. He chuckled and nodded his head. “Yes, I do always win.” He watched her slowly as she took a look around his gallery, sometimes for him, it was important to have Anouk’s approval in what he did because he needed someone to guide him. Sometimes he felt as if he was too young to do this alone but he realize he was nearing his mid twenties, he was getting old. He rolled his eyes at her and shook his head, waving his hand at her as if she were some annoying fly that he was swatting away. “Whatever, whatever darling.”

The distance between the both of them had been slowly increasing, and he could feel it but it was just something natural right? It was always going to happen and she and him both knew it, he was slightly upset but it was just the path of life. Some people grew distant and others didn’t. He laughed, moving forward and wrapping his arms around her once more. “Oh, I’m already used to it." Wiggling his eyebrows, he smiled at her cheekily and then slowly removed his arms from around her. He laughed and rolled his eyes at her, faking a pout when as he moved back to his normal space. “Alright then, alright, don’t want to ruin your reputation now do I?” Smiling at her, he moved fast, picking up his jacket and carrying it over his arm, grabbing his keys and wallet from his hiding space and then tapping in the code for the gallery. Even if his gallery was hidden amongst many other buildings, he still couldn’t afford to lose the art. He chuckled, beckoning her towards the door so that he could shut it from the outside. “I’ve already turned into a five year old Anouk.”

tagged// anouk!
word count// six hundred and ninety eight!
muse// breathe carolina - i have to go return some video tapes!
thoughts// whee!