for you only · alexei · COMPLETE

[anouk lirienne fournier]

It annoyed Anouk a bit how Alex seemed to avoid all contact with her, and it hurt her a bit when she realized it wasn’t the excitement what got him to do things as fast but the fact that their parents could be back home soon. She didn’t see where the problem was really, as long as they acted normal and told them they were out for a walk they wouldn’t think anything out of it, in fact her mother would be more than happy to see they were getting along so well. She rolled her eyes hiding the actual pain she was feeling. “They are not coming back anytime soon, don’t worry.” Was all that he could think of where they were about to have a date? When they finally had managed to get together? Sure it was weird for him and everything but he was the one confessing this time, not her. If he wasn’t ready at all then he should have shut his mouth up instead of telling her. Anouk mentally scolded herself for thinking such things. What was she thinking? Doubting of Alexei in such an outrageous way? She’d rather have him this way that none at all, unless he was forcing himself to do all this, in which case she will rather stay alone and hurt than hurt him.

Their first romantic date in the open, she could barely hold the excitement she was feeling as she practically ran to the door at the sound of Alex’s voice calling for her. She grabbed her coat in her way, just because she really was planning on taking it with her from the start; it was just fun to tease Alex when he went all overprotective of her. She raised an eyebrow at him and stopped by his side, tiptoeing a bit to kiss his check softly. “No, you don’t smell.” She said softly and proceeded to walk downstairs and off the apartment door to the cold night of Paris. Sad enough Anouk had never been on a real date, she didn’t want to do something with boys who will lead them to believe she had some sort of feeling for them. It was a bit depressing that she had to hide on her first date so she saved her distance from Alex as much as that hurt her. She hugged herself to keep the cold away, her coat being lighter that she believed at first.

The river soon came into view and Anouk went to look for a boat romantic enough. She checked first to see if there was someone they might know in there and when it seemed clear she waved at Alexei. Walking toward the farther end of the boat she rested her arms in the railing, facing the water and the city. It was right that Paris was the city of light and love, there was nothing more romantic that the wind playing with her air as they watched the city pass by, all lighted up and beautiful. And she was sharing all this with Alex, could the world get more perfect than this? It definitely couldn’t. “Isn’t this like a dream?.” She had dozens of dreams of them together, but none could compare with reality, it was even better knowing she could actually look for him with her hand and he would be there, solid, real… and for her and only her. It wasn’t a dream, she wasn’t going to wake up to have it all vanish in front of her eyes, this time she was going to wake up knowing he was down the hall waiting for her.

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 607
NOTES, so romantic *-*

[alexei leon fournier]

It was just the idea of their parents getting back, it was scaring him and making him feel slightly agitated. He had to make sure that they never guessed anything, for Alexei it was always difficult to keep a secret, well not really otherwise he would have no friends, but it was hard to keep things away from his parents. If he ever failed an exam he would tell them first, if he cheated he would tell them first, the guilt just ate him up and he felt like he couldn’t hide anything from is parents. Well correction, he couldn’t hide anything from his mom, but now that she was gone, now that he had a new mom he could hide things better, mainly because his new mom and his dad were always so loved up with one another that they didn’t notice anything at all. So would they not notice his new found happiness with Anouk? Would they notice the loving relationship that had bonded? He hoped that they wouldn’t, it would b best if they didn’t but Alex still had to be careful. He was the older one in the relationship and if anything went wrong then it was his entire fault and no one else’s. He smiled at Anouk and nodded his head. “Maybe, but we should get out just in case.”

He didn’t really know what to think of this as, was it their first date or second? Should he count their dinner as their first or part of their first? He was already so confused and it hadn’t been a full day into their relationship yet, but he was glad that they were taking things slow. He was slightly surprised that Anouk was allowing it to go this slow but he didn’t question it all too much, what was the point? It may start another argument and Alex liked staying away from confrontations. He raised an eyebrow but sighed in relief when he saw her wearing a coat and laughed when she kissed his cheek before commenting that he wasn’t smelly at all. When she was on her tiptoes, his hands went to gently encircle her waist but like before, he didn’t touch her, they were just suspended in the surrounding air. “I’m glad that I don’t.” He followed her down the stairs and into the dark, cold night of Paris, smiling at her because of her sudden enthusiasm, but on her it looked really cute.

Walking behind her was difficult because she tended to walk fast, and even though Alex would have liked to wrap his arm around her shoulder and walk together side by side, he didn’t. he controlled himself and waited behind as they reached the docks. When she waved at him, he smiled and made his way, going right to the end boat and standing behind her as she rested her arms on the railing. Looking at the back of Anouk, as the wind blew through her hair and as she smiled, Alexei couldn’t help but to smile. She looked so gorgeous I the moonlight and the urges to just touch her there and then was strong but as always he tried to stop himself, when she spoke though he couldn’t. he moved a bit closer to her, resting his head gently on her shoulder, still so restrained but he was touching her. His arms encircled her from behind and he let out a deep sigh. “Is it a dream? Should I pinch you?” He let out a small laugh next to her ear, his warm breath caressing her. Closing his eyes, he let out a little hum and sighed. “But it is like a dream, and I don’t want to wake up from this…ever.”

tagged// anouk!
word count// 624!
thoughts// aww <3

[anouk lirienne fournier]

Quite a lot of people in the past had said to her she was going to get her dreams come true and her fairy tale and Anouk had always answered the same thing. It was impossible for her to do so. Now she had to laugh at herself as she had to eat her own words and for once she wasn’t minding it one little bit. Though not everything was as perfect as it could be, they should be in a blissful state, the honeymoon as people called it, they should be touching and kissing each other every few moments because that was what people normally do when they are together for the first time, especially her that had waited for so long to get her prince. But no, Alexei was restraining himself and worrying about useless matters the night of their first date. She certainly didn’t want him to mull over such things as their parents that very first night taking into account they will have dozen of days to worry about it. Why ruining their first date then? Anouk sighed as he answered her but said nothing. It was useless fighting when she knew he was going to get his way, because she always allowed him to do so.

Anouk smiled at him when he surrounded her waist with his arms though he was still carefully not touching her. The thought of not being appealing enough for him crossed her mind again and she tried to hide another shot of pain in her features. It was of no use whatsoever letting him knows how he was hurting her by doing that. Walking fast was a habit of hers, especially when she was happy and excited, and it was a good way of keeping out of Alex’s way so she wasn’t tempted of touching him. Not that she cared they were in the streets though; it was him the one who did. Hiding things from her parents wasn’t a problem at all for her, she had been doing so all her life, and she even managed to keep secret the problem with drugs. She was still thinner having lost too much wait in the past six months but at least she was looking healthier now. Once they were in the boat with no one in sigh she hoped Alex would stop being so careful towards her. And her prayers got an answer. He came closer to her, resting his head on her shoulder and she leaned back into him when he surrounded her with his arms. Moving her arms from the railing she placed them above his and laced their fingers together. No one was going to see them here, and no one was going to think anything out of this as they were surrounded by other couples doing exactly the same thing.

She laughed softly at his comment and titled her head so she could gaze into his eyes. “I’ll rather wake up with a kiss than a pinch if you don’t mind.” Anouk said softly, chuckling a bit. She closed her eyes for a second enjoying his breathe on her check and the pressure if his body in her back. It was deliciously warm and comfortable, and it felt so right. They belonged, they were made for each other, and it couldn’t have been other way. She agreed with him, she wished time could stop so they could be in that moment forever. But since it couldn’t be that way she was going to at least enjoy it while it lasted. “I don’t want to wake up either.” She said, her voice just a whisper in the soft autumn wind. How much she loved him right at that moment and how perfect the moment was, surrounded by the lights of Paris, city of love, as if encouraging them. “I love you.” She couldn’t stop saying it now, not after two years of saving the secret. Now she could said it out loud and she wasn’t going to waste anymore time.

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 673
NOTES, so romantic *-*

[alexei leon fournier]

He truly was terrified of someone finding out about the both of them; it was just always going to be stuck in his mind. There were a lot uncles, aunts and cousins who lived around the area too, so it wouldn’t just be Alex’s dad and Anouk’s mom who’d worry about this new relationship, it would be every Fournier in the country. He was never good at reading through a girl’s mind, he was never good at trying to understand what their feelings were and being away from a girl for the past few years had intensified his lack of knowledge about how a girl felt. That really was how stupid he was, he was an idiot because he didn’t notice Anouk’s slight change in facial expression. He couldn’t’ help but to feel even more so strongly attracted to Anouk as he walked behind her but for some reason he felt like a rapist, following a girl in the dark night and wearing a scarf around his neck as if to protect his identity. It was true though, he was following a girl in the dark night, a scarf wrapped around his neck to protect his identity because he didn’t want anyone to know it was him, he didn’t want people stopping him and talking to him, he just wanted to be with Anouk. Smiling against her skin when they finally managed to reach the boat without any halts, his smile grew wider as she leaned back against him and laced their fingers together. Softly he squeezed her fingers with his and sighed; now this was how being a couple was supposed to feel like. No worries and not having to look around every few seconds in fear of someone recognising you.

Looking down at her with a smile, he sighed when she gazed up at him. He raised an eyebrow softly and let out a sweet chuckle. When she closed her eyes he moved closer towards her, planting a soft kiss on her cheeks and smiling at the contact between them. “That alright?” It did feel good, well, it actually felt great. He couldn’t explain the feeling of having her so close to him, he couldn’t explain how it made him feel so warm and happy on the inside, or how deliciously loving it felt. They seemed to be a little bit too romantic, but there was nothing wrong with it, in fact he liked the idea of being romantic as he was one himself, he wanted everything to go perfect, but perfect was always so overrated. When she spoke, he just snuggled up to her closer in response, gently kissing her neck for a second before sighing and resting his head once more against her shoulder. He closed his eyes, revelling in the moment between them for a second and smiled at her proclaim of love again. Keeping his eyes closed and his head tucked on her shoulder, he mumbled against her skin. “I love you too.” He removed his hands from hers and rubbed his hands against the back of her hands, hoping to help them become warm again. “How are your scars?” He hadn’t spoken about what had happened that day in the bathroom or in the hospital, but now was the time, right? He just wanted to make sure that she was doing fine and not hurting anymore.

tagged// anouk!
word count// 563!
thoughts// they are sickeningly romantic ^^

[anouk lirienne fournier]

She didn’t want to worry anymore, so she pushed everything off her mind. This was going to be a night for the two of them and by golly is she was going to enjoy it. It made her laugh a lot how Alexei looked like walking down the street wrapped in a scarf and looking at both sides as if someone was stalking him. It was so exaggerated. “Can you stop looking so suspicious?” She said to him between laughs. “We are just a brother and a sister going together on a walk.” They had done this dozens of times before, walking together down the streets of Paris, mostly when she went to his gallery and they came back home together. She was remembering that night they had spent together back home and he had no problems touching her back then. She made a mental note of remembering him so later. The boat was too romantic for Anouk’s taste, full of couples enjoying the nights just like them. But she didn’t know it was going to make her feel this way, so… strange and complete, happy. She had never known what a proper date was in the first place.

He placed a chaste kiss on her check and her eyes flew open. She hadn’t actually expected him to kiss her; in fact she had been sure he was going to ignore her comment. Anouk smiled at him lovingly though because right now he was everywhere, whenever he touched her there was fire in her skin. She could only start to imagine how that would feel in a determinate situation. But right now this was fine, this was enough, the way he hugged her made her feel special. “Yes, that’s alright.” She had to shake her head at herself, all that time complaining about her parents being lovey-dovey and acting like teenagers and now she was just like them with Alexei. She giggled a bit and her heart skipped a few beats when he hugged her even closer. He took her breath away every time she looked up at him, it was as if she never got used to his handsome face. When he kissed her neck a shiver ran thought her body from head to toe and she had to suppress the urge of titling her head to give him better access… or to attack him. She was pretty sure that was going to scare him off.

He tried to warm her hands and then he finally asked one of the things that had been bugging him all along. She didn’t know if she should be happy about it or worried about having to talk. Anouk had been avoiding it as long as she could because it was painful for both of them. “It’s… fine. It barely hurts anymore.” The skin was still a bit tender and it bothered her sometimes when she moved her wrist. “It’s not going to completely vanish you see… it’s going to be there as a reminder of what I did.” Suddenly she started to feel cold and she didn’t know if it was because of the air or because of the topic she was talking about, she snuggled closer to him, trying to find again the warm of his body. “I’m fine Alex, I have everything I need right here with me. I am not going to do such a thing ever again.” She knew he was worried about it; she needed to reassure him everything was going to be fine with or without him. Anouk didn’t want to keep him by her side if he didn’t want to be there, she didn’t need his pity, she just needed his love which was what she was getting now.

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 624
NOTES, makes me believe in fairy tales lol

[alexei leon fournier]

Sure they had walked down the streets of Paris enough times, but this was different, he couldn’t help but to act like how he was doing then, it was just how he was feeling. He was terrified of someone seeing them holding hands, of someone tracing their every movement. A lot of Anouk’s friends already knew that she had liked him in this way, they already knew that he liked her back, he wondered if they were crept out by this all or were they just happy that Anouk had found someone? He raised an eyebrow as Anouk spoke to him in between laughs. Shrugging his shoulders, he let out a small smile. “If you say so…” He wanted to spend quite a bit of time with her, but out in the open it would be difficult because he was always so worried about everything and everyone, it would be long, but one day it would come into his head that he had nothing to worry about, that if people figured out it would be better so he could stop trying to hide their relationship.

Not knowing if he should actually kiss her or not, Alexei had opted for the easy way out, one on her cheek, at least that would be seen as brotherly, but not the way he was holding her; that would definitely not be seen as brotherly but he was pretty sure that no one would notice them now. They were quite far away from the nearest people so they wouldn’t be noticed easily and that made Alexei relax in Anouk’s presence, he didn’t seem to have that full restraint on himself, maybe a tiny bit but it wasn’t as major as it was before. He smiled happily when she told him that it was alright, he was happy that everything he seemed to be doing then was good enough for Anouk, knowing that he didn’t have enough experience to match hers was sort of upsetting but he wasn’t really upset, he just felt as if he wouldn’t be able to give her what she properly wanted but he was going to try and hopefully it would be enough. When he kissed her neck he felt as if he had gone too far, maybe he had and maybe he hadn’t but it didn’t stop him from removing his mouth from her neck once more and just resting his head against her shoulder, maybe he’ll try it again later because that had felt good and the shiver he felt that ran through Anouk’s body at the very moment he had done so made him feel great, he wouldn’t mind feeling that great again.

It was difficult not to look at her hands every few seconds after what she had done, but Alex had controlled his gaze many a times just to make sure that she wouldn’t notice, he didn’t want her to be hurt that was the only thing on his mind. When she told him it was fine, he scoffed softly, making sure that she wouldn’t hear before turning her wrist over and pulling back her sleeve a bit to look at the scar. It was dark so he couldn’t see it all too much but it was there all right, and it looked horrible. Sure it was fading, but he didn’t like the idea of it on her at all. He gently traced his finger down it, making sure not to touch it just in case she hurt. As she snuggled against him, he released her hand gently and hugged her some more, moving in closer towards her and snuggling his nose against her neck. “I’m glad you won’t, you will never be able to imagine what went through me when I saw you on the floor.” He shook his head and sniffled a little due to the cold. He laced his fingers with hers once more and sighed.

tagged// anouk!
word count// 654!
thoughts// hah i know what you mean.

[anouk lirienne fournier]

Anouk knew very well they were more than that, but the outside world didn’t and if he acted so suspicious around here there was the chance people will start to wonder what was going on and then they will look for clues. The key of everything was acting natural, and that was something Alexei didn’t know how to do. She had to give him credit for trying though, and for relaxing a bit more once they were inside the boat. He worried too much about what people around them thought, and there were reasons to worry, even she knew that, but she just didn’t want to think about them right now and so she was making a big effort to keep calm and not snap at him for being so wary. Once he touched her though everything calmed down inside her and the world became a better place. It didn’t matter if it was a kiss on the check or the lips as long as he kept his body pressed up against her and their hands joined together. She loved how everything made her feel inside, how everything in the world seemed to be in the right place and how all the turmoil inside her mind vanished with one simple touch. But they weren’t simple at all this time, he was kissing her neck and that was making her go nuts, if he did so one more time she was going to jump over him without a previous warn.

She hated it when he turned her palm and pulled back her sleeve to look at the thin scar there. The eternal reminder of what she had done, and that will bring pain to Alex’s eyes every time he looked at it. She shivered again when he traced it with his finger though he didn’t touch it. And laughed a bit when he snagged her neck with his nose, that was it, she was about to cross the line and kiss him but his lips were far from her reach so she bit her lip so hard again that she hurt herself. But it was an afternoon of ups and downs, and hearing him saying that with such pain in his voice hurt her deeply. She flinched a bit, not wanting to feel that pain again, not wanting to see it on Alex’s eyes or hear it in his voice, she wished she could turn back the time, if only she had been stronger, if only she hadn’t told him, if only she never went to take that shower, if she would have handle things better… But all those ifs had brought them together in the end so she didn’t know if it was good or bad in the end. Her mind a mess full of confused thoughts. “No, I don’t know. But I think I have a close idea of what you felt.” Because she was sure whatever he felt right at moment she had felt it ten times worst the moment she raised the razor and cut her wrist with it. But of course she wasn’t going to even let him show a glimpse of her darkest thoughts and feelings. “I don’t want you to even think about it Alex, I’ve told you already. It was my choice and only mine, and I was stupid and reckless and I wasn’t thinking. I never meant to hurt you, though it’s too late to go back and too late to say I am sorry. But it’s pasts, for you at least.”

It definitely wasn’t going to be past for her, she will have to deal with the heavy burned of having hurt him so deeply, but she knew Alex could get over it if he saw her happy enough. And he was definitely making Anouk a very happy girl right at the moment. She titled her face to the side and up, tiptoeing a bit to reach his jaw and kissing it softly. She got more comfortable between his arms and turned around to rest her face in his chest, listening closely to the sound if his heartbeat, the most beautiful sound in the world for her aside from his voice.

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 700
NOTES, alex always blaming himself and bringing up hurtful topics lol anouk is gonna erase those thoughts of his mind lol

[alexei leon fournier]

With the way Anouk was reacting to his touches, he could tell that she liked what he was doing and that brought him happiness, at least he was good at what he was doing. But he was sure that because of how wary he was acting and how he kept on stopping every few seconds to make sure that there wasn’t anyone keeping a close eye on them, was getting on her nerves too, he would have felt annoyed if she kept on doing that. He just couldn’t stop himself, no matter how much he actually wanted to. He wanted to just free his mind of all the worries in his head, he really did. What person would want to be piled down with worry after worry after worry on his shoulder? Alexei would have loved to be free from it all, but he was the responsible one, the one who made sure everything was good and alright before diving into it and he was going to make sure that everything was fine before he dived into this relationship with Anouk, even if he was keeping it a secret from some people, he needed to make sure that everything was as best as it could be before doing anything. Because he knew of Anouk’s impulsive nature, he was pretty much sure that she was going to get very easily annoyed with this, but even so he was teasing her right? And in a relationship, teasing was definitely not allowed; that was one of the things that he didn’t feel sorry for at all.

He had no idea why out of all days, toady was the day that he wanted to see Anouk’s wrist, today was the day he wanted to see the scar that could have taken the love of his life away from him and to be honest, his heart was actually pounding pretty fast when he had pulled back the sleeve of her top. He was pained by it all but he tried his best to not show it at all, he didn’t want her to be upset of how upset she was. Their relationship seemed to work differently than most others’, if one was upset the other would try their best to pull them out of it but would end up being upset them, and he knew it was mainly because of him. He couldn’t settle down for once and be happy, he had to just let all these miserable thoughts whirl around in his head and he was the one who was going to bring an early demise to this relationship if he wasn’t careful. He hadn’t expected her to reply at all to what he had said, he felt guilty for even saying it now, they should have moved far away from this topic, it would have been best if they did. But now that they were in the midst of this topic it would be best if they just spoke about and Alex would have to man up for once and just take it all on board. He didn’t speak during her lengthy speech, keeping his nose against her skin and his eyes closed as he listened to her intently, listened to the pain in her voice as she spoke about what she had done. “It is pasts, I don’t want you to even think about it either even though I know it’ll be difficult. You were stupid and reckless…” He spoke the last bit with a tease, he didn’t want her to think that he was actually calling her a stupid girl because she wasn’t, she had just done this in the heat of the moment and he couldn’t blame her for it.

Smiling as she leaned up to kiss his jaw, he closed his eyes once more, feeling slightly happy that a little bit of weight had been lifted from his heart. He looked down at her as she turned in his arms and burrowed her head against his chest. Smiling, with one hand, he began to softly stroke her hair, leaning down a bit to give her a head kiss and resting his head against her own.

tagged// anouk!
word count// 696!
thoughts// haha alex is too much of a pessimist.

[anouk lirienne fournier]

The reason she was burying her face on his chest was so he couldn’t simply see her cry. A few solitary tears had escaped her eyes when he had brought up the topic of her suicide attempt. Anouk knew they would have to talk about that but she didn’t expect it to be on her first day. But the sooner they dealt with it, the better. That way she could finally have some peace of mind and put an end to Alex’s guilt and pain. She actually had no idea how she would do that, because she had the impression no matter what she said he would keep blaming himself for it. And Anouk couldn’t really tell him he was wrong, though she had no idea what she was thinking about when the situation happened. “Alex... There is a difference between the blame I can take and the one you can take. I can’t ask you to forget or forgive what I did, but you will have to get over it. I can’t. It will always be there, and you can’t do a thing about it.” She tried to clean her tears in Alex’s clothes before she could look up to him again, feeling his soft lips in her hair. She smiled, he was so sweet and cute. And such a pessimist. But she was positive enough for both of them and she believed she could at least change a bit of his point of view with her enthusiasm and her stubbornness. Anouk wasn’t going to allow him to ruin their date.

So taking a few deep breathes and locking her eyes with his, she proceeded to say something she had wished to say for a very long time and couldn’t. “I love you. And sometimes it won’t seem enough for you, sometimes it will seem wrong and hard and tiresome, and we are definitely going to fight, and we are both going to get hurt.” She took another deep breath, trying to hold tears in their rightful place, she wasn’t going to allow him to see her cry, it was a pride thing. “ But since the first time I met you in that park with mom and dad, I just knew something was going to happen. I just saw how especial you were and how important you were going to be in my life. Since then Alex, every single little thing I did in my life, good or bad, it had been with you in mind, and in the end it doesn’t matter what I did because it brought us together” Anouk wasn’t at all a clingy girl, or too dependent of people at all, but she wanted to show him everything she had been hiding in her heart for such a long time, those feelings she had been forced to silence. “It was all worth it Alexei. It was all absolutely worth it. I still love you like the first time, if not more. That it’s unchangeable.”

If he ever blamed himself again for what she did, she was really going to get hurt. She knew their relationship wasn’t going to be perfect, and damn the world if she wanted it to be so. But she knew she was going to take gladly whatever the world decided to throw at her if she could protect what she had with him. “I would do anything to keep this, never doubt it.” If her parents ever discovered what was going on, if they tried to tear them apart she was sure going to fight with all her might. After all the effort she had made to get him, who was going to even try?

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 615
NOTES, dammit alex and anouk's muse >.<

[alexei leon fournier]

He had no idea what to do, normally whenever Anouk hugged him he could easily hug her back, but this was awkward. This was awkward because they were now a couple but he tried his best not to show it, he could tell there was something more in what she was doing. The way she was hugging him made him feel as if there was some other meaning deep behind her strong hold on him and he didn’t want to let her go in that moment, because he felt as if she really did need him. He kept his head close to her so that he could hear what she was saying, for some reason the tone in her voice made his heart break, it was as if she was staying strong for him but he was just tearing her down by bringing up all these horrible topics and that made Alex feel even guiltier. But he tried to push it aside, he had to stop feeling guilty because this was what she didn’t want, she wanted him to just be happy in the relationship, to forget about everything that had happened even if she couldn’t herself. He sighed as she lifted up her head to look at him, he did notice the little drops in her eyes, and a few of her tears had sort of seeped through his clothes but he made no comment, she was trying to hide it all away from him and he was going to give her at least that. “I know there’s nothing I can do. Promise me though, if there’s anything, anything that hurts you at all you’ll tell me alright?” Moving his hands up, he gently stroked her cheeks, hoping to get rid of a few stray tears without her knowing.

He held her face upwards while she locked eyes with him, his hands still holding onto her face as he looked at her with a longing in his eyes, a longing that had hardly ever been there before but now that he saw Anouk in a way that he never imagined, he didn’t even bother to hide those feelings, because right there, on that boat, it was only the both of them. There was no one else at that very moment so he could relax and he could tell that by the way she was looking at him, that what she had to say was very important and he was all ears for it. He didn’t show any signs of emotion as she continued to speak, as she told him how much he actually meant to her. For once, he finally realised how much she loved him, how much she had kept bottled in for the past two years, how much she wanted him and Alexei knew that he wanted her exactly the way she did. He couldn’t help but to smile as she spoke, telling him that her love was unchangeable, sure he hoped that he could change her mind for a second when he first had heard about it, but now he was hoping she wouldn’t change her mind at all, he was hoping that she would keep on loving him the way that she already did.

Slowly he moved his hands downwards and placing them on her hips, he picked her up, making sure she had her arms wrapped around him somewhere. Twirling her around for a second with a big smile on his face, he placed her back down in her original spot. “I don’t think I’m going to doubt it anymore.” Smiling, he cupped her face for a second, hesitant to move forwards. His eyes glanced from her lips to her eyes, and with another smile he gently pushed forwards, placing his lips against hers. “I love you so much, so very much Anouk, you should never doubt that either.

tagged// anouk!
word count// 645!
thoughts// aww they're so adorable!

[anouk lirienne fournier]

It was almost impossible to hide the tears for him but she tried at least, and it was unbearable watching Alex’s pained face as she talked about that horrible moment in her life. She dreaded the topic and avoided it like the plague but she knew at some point this was going to happen, because it was eating them up. Guilt was heavy in his eyes but he at least listened to her in silence and her speech actually seemed to have the effect she had wanted. Anouk tried to lift that burden off his shoulder, and tried to lift the guilt from his soul too even when she knew it was almost as impossible as removing her own. She was holding onto him as if he was going to vanish in a puff of smoke at any moment and she will wake up in her bed, but so far he didn’t. Still she needed the support and he seemed to sense it because he kept hugging her, providing her of the warm and the courage she needed to get pass her tears and talk about the most difficult topic in their relationship. Their family was nothing compared to this, if they couldn’t get over this there was no way they would get over their parents either. She closed her eyes at his touch, titling her head so she can rest her check in his hands, this was one of the most hurtful things she will have to do in their relationship, she hoped as hell this topic would be closed down forever once they said everything that was left to say. “I promise.” But Anouk knew she was lying, she wasn’t going to be able to tell him most of the times because she wasn’t going to hurt him with that.

Taking another deep breath she seemed to calm down a bit, Alex seemed to understand what she was saying but he show no emotion during her speech. What hurt Anouk the most that time she confessed wasn’t being rejected, she was ready for that from the start, but him telling her to change her mind, to forget about him, to change those deep feelings she had and throw them all away. He didn’t have any consideration toward them right at that moment and that had been the breaking point. For her there was nothing more precious than her feelings for him. Now everything was different and not only had he taken into consideration her feelings but he had corresponded her with his owns, it had been the happiest moment of her life and she smiled softly as she remembered it. Alex moved his hand down to her hips and lifted her, twirling her around. Surprised by such sudden display f affection she let out a small laugh as he placed her again on the ground. It seemed to work, that speech she had given him, because he said he wasn’t going to doubt ever again about her love for him, and not only that but he kissed her again. She closed her eyes enjoying the moment, all the stars on the sky shinning brighter above her as her mind went blank and she felt light head. Every time he kissed her knees gave her away, and a deep blush creep on her checks. “I won’t doubt it either.”

Biting her lower lip she debated between telling him or not. There was still something she wanted to say, and it seemed the right moment. Something that for sure would erase the blame and guilt from his soul and the she hoped he would never ever forget in his life even if in a future they weren’t together anymore. She cringed away from that thought, that wasn’t going to happen. “Do you want to know what was the last thing I saw when I closed my eyes in that moment? Your face, crystal clear. When everything around me was blurry and disappearing it was you all I saw. Do you want to know what made me fight? What made me come back? Your voice. I heard you calling my name... I fought for you... you do miracles on me... don’t ever say again you are to blame. You are my savior.” She kissed him again, this time taking the lead. It was a very chaste kiss compared to those she had in the past, but it made her feel like no other.

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 743
NOTES, that was what I wanted to said in the first thread lol but inspiration came around 7 am and I have to type it all down on my ipod and sent myself an email so I wouldn't forget hahaha

[alexei leon fournier]

Emotionally, Alexei was never prepared for any news that was big. He wasn’t prepared for anything that could potentially hurt his life. When the doctors told him that his mother was dead, he couldn’t handle it. He never seemed to be an emotionally stable boy, because when that news was revealed to him, he had literally burst out crying, he was only eleven and he had received the news that his mother was dead. Sure there were more horrible things in life, but his mother was dead and death was something that he hoped he didn’t have to go through ever again unless it was his own. Seeing a corpse for the first time hadn’t scarred him for life. In fact he treasured that moment when he saw his mothers remains, her heavily charred, yet still pale body, on top of the bed. Even though there were burn marks all around her face, she seemed even more so calm than how she was before. When Anouk was literally dying in Cass’s arms, it reminded him of the first time he was ever in hospital with his mom dead and he realized that he didn’t want Anouk to leave him, that she had to be there for him even if he was an asshole at one point or another in their relationship. Sighing in relief when she promised him, he gently moved her face side to side in between his hands, smiling at her with relief and happiness flushed across his face. He would have kissed her, he would have but he was saving it for just a few seconds later. He always took Anouk’s words as the truth, sure she lied to him about a lot of things, but he didn’t think she would lie to him about something so big, and so he was trusting her on this one.

He didn’t doubt her at all, what she was telling him now was the truth and he had to believe that, he couldn’t let insecurity ruin his life. Lots of people believed that men, boys, they all didn’t have any sort of insecurity in their body, that they were all just the cocky little confident gits that they were, but it wasn’t true. Alexei felt insecure of a lot of things about him and just by listing them all it would have taken at least a couple of days or so. But now that Anouk had taken the time out to tell him how much he actually meant to her, well he had to let these insecurities go didn’t he? Snip, snip, snip them away until all he felt was freedom and happiness. Everyone deserved freedom and happiness, some more than others but Alexei new that he was one guy who definitely needed all that. He hadn’t expected her to suddenly laugh, and even though he managed to have control over his head and not move it about, his eyes gazed around trying to see if anyone noticed. He sighed in relief though when he placed her on the ground because everyone else was too loved up with their partners to even care about himself and Anouk. He smiled, nodding his head happily. “Good, that’s very good.”

Eyes shining brightly and with a mischievous look that hardly ever appeared on his face, Alex kept himself close to Anouk, not wanting to separate from her in this romantic moment. He eyed the biting of her lip warily, wondering what else Anouk had wanted to say because she only did that whenever she had something important to blurt out. With an eyebrow raised, he listened to her, emotions once again wiped clear off of his face as he continued to let her speak and finish. To say he was shocked was an understatement. He found it really surprising; he wasn’t expecting something like this at all. It was he who did miracles on her? She must have been out of her mind when she thought things like that because it was she who did miracles on him and he was intending on letting her know that at the very least. Before he could speak though she had leaned forward and kissed him, which surprised him more. Smiling into the kiss, he pulled her face closer to his with his hands, not really wanting to let her go. Mumbling through their kiss he managed to at least get one sentence out. “You’re the one who does miracles on me, so don’t ever blame yourself either, for anything.” Smiling once more, he moved one arm to wrap around her waist and pulled her closer.

tagged// anouk!
word count// 770!
thoughts// ugh, i loved that post!

[anouk lirienne fournier]

She had lie about a lot of things, and it pained her to keep doing so, but it was for his good and so Anouk didn’t feel that guilty about it. Of course she was going to tell him if something was hurting her, but only if it was something he could manage knowing, something minor and that won’t place much worry on him. But she was hoping there was no need anymore, because right at that very moment she felt the happiest and luckiest girl in the world, she had everything she needed and everything she wanted between her arms, and he was hugging her with such strength that she knew he wasn’t going to let her go anytime soon. She tried to make him happy, she tried her hardest and gave up too much for it, and she was willing to even give more if necessary, because she truly believed he deserved it all. All her efforts and sacrifices and tears, the laughs and the smiles… everything, he deserved them all. She smacked his chest when she realized he had been worrying again about someone seeing them, couldn’t he enjoy one full minute without looking around as if they were criminals on the run? Of course people were going to suspect if he kept doing that! But at least he was showing a bit more affection and was relaxing little by little which was what she had been looking for all along. She raised an eyebrow at him, laughing a little. “Alex, you do realize you look even more suspicious if you keep doing that, right?” Though to be honest the rest of the couples were enjoying their night happily without giving a damn about the rest, which was something she wished she could do too.

But right now she didn’t have any complains as he was keeping her as close as it could be without melting into one. She could even feel his heartbeat and it was making her own go to a faster pace. As she finished saying everything that was there to say she could see shock in his face, she hadn’t expected shock but being Alexei she didn’t know why she was so surprised. And then the magic happened and fire was everywhere. At first her eyes flew open when Alex took her face between his hands to close even more the distance in their faces, his lips soft and firms against hers, it send shivers down her spine and her mind just went blank. Listening to him mumbling against her lips sent blissful waves of pleasure through her whole body that tingled with emotion. She smiled too, deepening the kiss and circling his neck with her arms, fingers paying with his hair when he wrapped her and pulled her closer. She had to stop gasping for air though and broke the kiss before she lost total control of her mind and went further than that. She knew he wanted to take things slow but whenever he touched her she just couldn’t help but feel the urge of keeping him forever. Anouk tried to calm down, her breath faster than she had expected and her face felt hot, she slowly untangled her fingers from his hair and placed her hands on his chest, still pressed against him, her forehead against his. “If you don’t want me to attack you, don’t do that again. But if you dare to move right now, you are a dead man.” She said joking, closing her eyes as her breathe steadied and her world stopped spinning around her.

She realized she wasn’t paying attention at all to their beautiful background, but who could care about Paris when she had it all gazing into his eyes? Nothing was more beautiful than the light shinning in his brown eyes and the love and warm she was seeing in them. Anouk was sure hers showed a mix of love and lust; now that he was touching her she just needed it even more. It was as if she had been on pain without knowing and everything healed with his touch, and whenever he stopped doing so the pain came back silently. But right now? Alas if she was enjoying that! She thought she could bear not touching him and going slow, and now she realized how difficult that would be when he was around. His body seemed to sent electric currents that made her go nuts.

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 744
NOTES, me too ahaha

[alexei leon fournier]

He didn’t mean to make everything look so suspicious, it was just in his nature to act the way he was, it was just scary that someone who might know their parents may just see the both of them kissing. But he was relaxing, he was! The muscles in his body weren’t as tense as they were before and he was really trying his best to just make everything seem natural. He was proud of himself because when it came to awkward situations, Alexei was the king of awkwardness. He shrugged his shoulders at her, “I’m trying my best, be proud of me woman!” He was sure that she was at least slightly happy by how much his tentativeness had decreased by, because if she wasn’t well then he would be happy for the both of them. His arm muscles didn’t freeze up in worry all that much anymore when he went forward to touch her, but this was a long time they were spending together, he was sure that the next moment they spent together would start off with his awkward touches as always.

As always, everything to do with Anouk was indescribable, her touches, her kiss…it was all just perfect. The warmth of her skin against his just seemed to melt away and cold feeling in his body, it unfroze the ice in his muscles and made him want her even more. His grip tightened when she began to play with his hair, it wasn’t known by many people, but having his hair played with was a big guilty pleasure and he sort of mumbled incoherent words to Anouk. His whole body was electric, on fire, she was doing things to him that no other girl had managed to ever do before and he wondered if she could actually sense that. The idea in his head to suddenly stop the kisses was strong though, it seemed to have just popped out of nowhere, so when she finally pulled away from him, he kept his eyes closed, taking in deep breaths just as she was doing. His eyes opened and rolled upwards so he could take a look at his hair. Tufts were sticking upwards, side wards and diagonally from the way Anouk ran her hands through them. He let out a small chuckle, his hands laced hers for a second before letting go and he smiled as she pressed their foreheads together. Taking a few deep breaths again, he looked at her and spoke. “Alright, no more kissing, I think we’ve both had enough for one night.” He smiled at her, his chest rising up and down, letting go of her hands

The smile on his face gently faded as he realised how open the both of them had been with each other that night. It was as if they were saying things that they couldn’t keep back anymore, so with a deep breath he steadied himself. He was going to ask her a lot of questions, he wanted to know so much but she had always refused to give him answers. Maybe she would reward him with some tonight? “When…when were you diagnosed with depression? Did Cass know anything about this? How far did Cass’s and your relationship go?” He was slightly jealous of Cass and he was sure that Anouk knew that, but he wanted answers.

tagged// anouk!
word count// 560!
thoughts// this is a horrid post, so sorry!

[anouk lirienne fournier]

She was actually proud of him; she knew the effort he was doing to figure the entire situation out. Taking into account not long ago he had been thinking of her as a sister it was more than she could ask of him right now. She laughed at him but said nothing, just shrugged her shoulders. Alexei looked funny always looking around but it was true he had relaxed a whole lot more, maybe because he was getting used to her presence. And of course the kisses and hugs helped to relax the situation, or maybe added some fuel to the fire deep within them. Anouk sure was having a hard keeping her touches to something he would be able to bear, if it was her she would be kissing the hell out of him all the time, no break, no mercy. But she couldn’t very well do that to him and so she was restraining a lot more than him. It didn’t help one little bit when he lost his own control because her own lust ran free through her. She had such experience with men that her body found weakness in matter of seconds, Alex’s body was saying a lot of things to her, and she was surprised to realize he had the same yearning she did. Up until now she thought it was a matter of not being appealing enough, but now she knew it was because he wasn’t ready.

She scolded at him when he said no more kissing was allowed that night. To hell with that, she was never going to get enough of him but she will have to tone down her kissing or she will end up eating him up. Something Anouk very much wished. “As if, but I promise to be more careful.” She knew it was going to take a lot of effort but she was going to do it gladly for him. Anouk raised an eyebrow as Alex’s smiled faded, that was a bad omen, and he was sure going to say something hurtful again, or ask something important. She had always kept her love life away from Alexei, one thing was he knowing she had been with uncountable boys and another one was him knowing what he did with them. He wasn’t stupid though, he could very much imagine that when she spent nights off all the time and slept at those boy’s houses. And of course he had to ask about Cass, it seemed that bothered him more than the rest of the guys, maybe because she had more feelings for Cass than for the rest. “When I went with Audrey to the hospital… though I already knew it.” She frowned struggling for words that wouldn’t hurt him, but there was no way around that truth this time, and no way to put it up all nice.

Still Anouk knew he was going to take her words the worst possible way. When it came to Cass Alex seemed to go always for the bad side of everything. “No, of course he didn’t know, nobody did. He was my… safe place. He helped me to forget. To ease the pain during some hours at least.” She had even kept the depression from Cass, there was no need for him to know. “Are you seriously asking me how far did we go?” She raised an eyebrow almost laughing. There was Alex proving her wrong, he could really be an idiot alright, and it was actually cute. But sure the cuteness will go away once she answered that question. Not that he wouldn’t imagined the answer though. “As far as a 'relationship' can go physically I guess, though I would never apply that term to us, and well there was some feelings involved though nothing major. But it’s the same with the rest of the boys. It was never feelings, it was just… sex.” She shook her head, she couldn’t imagine why he had to make her say that out loud.

----

OUTFIT, here
WORD COUNT, 667
NOTES, no problem, i have enough muse for both ^^